How patient are you? Really?
While reading Genesis, something stood out. We always hear and speak about the 40 days and nights of rain, but the waters took 150 days to recede. This reminds me of the recovery process. The Holy Spirit helped me connect what Noah endured and what I’m currently enduring.
Backstory:
This past March, I went to the emergency room because of weird tingling and numbing on the left side of my body that would not allow me to comfortably type while at the library. After an MRI, I was given the option of having brain surgery the next morning or in a few weeks to remove what the neurosurgeon referred to as a "grape-sized tumor" lodged in the right ventricle of my brain. The decision was made to go ahead and have the surgery the next day despite my desire to complete my assignment that was due in 2 days.
The surgery was successful (Praise God!); however, another scan revealed a small portion of the tumor had been left behind. A few days later, a second surgery took place. I was in the hospital, having surgeries, being poked, given scans and medications, and closely interacting with lots of different people for a total of 20 days. To describe the days as a "storm" is the best I can do. I'm very grateful to be alive and well. At the same time, I'm going through the process and reminding myself of the need for patience. Patience with the process and with myself.
The neurosurgeon wrote a Dr.'s note at the end of my hospital stay stating that I would be “ in recovery” for about 60 days. What the doctor gave was an approximate guess from a medical/physical perspective. However, the times vary from person to person. There are other aspects to consider, though. When we think about moving forward from an event, we sometimes assume it’s over when the “rain” stops. However, it’s a process. Processes involve stages and time. Stages and time require Patience and Endurance to make it to the other side of it all. I describe this as "waiting for the waters to recede."
For example, just as Noah waited for the water to leave, I'm waiting for my body to stop being "weird." I'm progressively getting stronger over time. After the second surgery, I had difficulty moving my left side, needed assistance to walk, and had trouble getting from point A to point B quickly. I am very grateful to currently be able to type and walk on my own at a more brisk pace. I still have physical therapy appointments, brain scans, and other parts of the process to complete, but the greatest news is I'm alive to complete them! The tumor was found before it was "too late," and it was benign.
*Insert Praise Break!
Hope and Faith are needed to continue to believe that the other side of it all will be better. I wish I could ask Noah how his mentality was while waiting all those days for the flood waters to recede so he could get back to “normal.” I’m seeing, though, that there is never a such thing as a true normal. The pandemic taught me that. Honestly, every trial I’ve ever endured has taught me that. Situations change you for better or worse depending on how you choose to receive, learn, and grow from them. You’re not the same, so there’s no “normal” to which to return.
This helps me not get too frustrated with life when certain aspects of it are “different.” I can reflect and ask myself, How have I changed? How has my environment changed? I can also pray and ask the Lord, "What adjustments do I need to make to ensure that the changes help me become better, stronger, and wiser? Which changes are beyond my control? Which changes are a matter of patience and time?" It's important that I seek and establish what I am praying and believing He will do through, in, and for me because of this situation.
After all the pain, discomfort, and downtime I’ve endured, I do NOT want this process to be in vain. I’m believing that God is using and will continue to use it ALL to shift me to a new level of wisdom, boldness, confidence, and understanding. I’m also believing that I have the strength, favor, provision, and time to finish any and all assignments He has for me in Jesus’ name.
Now... What about you? I pray that this small portion of my testimony encourages you in some way.
Reflect on a time or situation in your life when it came down to a matter of patience and endurance. Answer the following questions personally, or if you're comfortable, type your answers here!
1. What did you do to keep yourself from giving up? Was there a certain song, sermon, verse, book, or person that helped to keep you going?
2. What good came out of the situation? For example, how did you become stronger, wiser, or better after having gone through it?
A Few Verses to Consider:
Ecclesiastes 7:8 (NIV)-The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.
Colossians 3:12 (NIV)-Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Isaiah 40:29-31 (NIV)-29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. 30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.